All's Fair In Love And War
by Silver Inklett
Summary: It was the warning shot, ringing through Shibusen like the bell that sang between classes.It was the rumor, spreading like a virus from class to class, leaving no ear untouched. It was the war that they waged, fighting with words and practical jokes.
1. Chapter 1

**-0-**

It was the warning shot, ringing through Shibusen like the bell that sang between classes.

It was the rumor, spreading like a virus from class to class, leaving no ear untouched.

It was the war that they waged, fighting with words and practical jokes.

It was the prank war, fought between meister and Death Scythe, dragging the entire school down into the fight with them. Green verses red, blonde verses silver, girl verses boy. Years into the future, students would whisper about the epic battle in worshipful tones, pointing them out as they strode down the hall.

"Is that them?"

"I heard he replaced her shampoo with hair dye."

"Supposedly she dyed all his underwear pink."

"No way! That's awesome!"

"Excactly! I wonder how it all started…"

How it started was on a warm fall day in Nevada. It was peaceful, quiet (well, as quiet as a school could be), and no one suspected a _thing. _Especially not Soul "Eater" Evans as he strode down the hall, shoulders thrown back and hands in his pockets as he headed to collect his meister from her English class. He stared forward, avoiding eye contact with any of the giggling girls on the sideline as much as humanly possible.

"YO SOUL!" The albino teen stopped, rolling his eyes once before turning around to face the blue-haired midget with a god-complex.

"Hey BlackStar," he said, his rough voice sounding bored and cool. BlackStar jumped into his face, his lips pulled back in a giant shit-eating grin.

"Bet you're glad a God like me would come and walk with you to collect tiny tits from her boring class!" He yelled, turquoise eyes flashing. Soul smirked and high fived his friend, both boys turning and heading down the hall once more.

"Yeah sure, that's it," Soul said with a laugh, making the girls in the hall swoon. "Where's Tsubaki? I thought you two were joined at the hip."

"Well, even Tsubaki can't be expected to stand in my shadow all the time!"

"What did you do to piss her off this time?" Black Star laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head.

"I may or may not have… grabbedherassingym." Soul rolled his eyes and sighed. '_Idiot,' _he thought, eyeing the ninja meister with unamused crimson eyes.

"You're excellent with women aren't you?" Just as Black Star opened his mouth to protest, the two boys noticed the entire hall had gone silent. They stood in front of the mission board, and Soul was the first to notice that instead of spread out all over everyone was crowded in the same corner.

And that they were all _staring at him._

He arched a silver eyebrow, and his puzzled expression only deepened when they all started giggling at him, trying to hide their faces from his.

"Oh my god, is that him?"

"It's kind of hard to miss him."

"How embarrassing!"

Soul frowned, stepping towards the group, leaving Black Star behind to rant about how everyone should be paying attention to him instead of some board. He expected to have to push through the group of people to get to the board, but he was shocked when the group split in front of him like the Red Sea parting for Moses. Quirking an eyebrow, and looking warily at the people trying to conceal their giggles around him, Soul reached the board.

"-THE GREAT BLACK STAR IS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THAN SOME BOARD, 'CAUSE I'M GONNA SURPASS GO-"

"**WHAT THE HELL!"** Black Star stopped at the sound of his friend's enraged roar. He popped his head around the wall of people and saw that the Death Scythe was standing in front of the board, teeth bared, eyes wide, and fingers pulled through his hair. Mentally wondering what could have possibly made his friend this mad, Black Star joined him at the board.

And promptly fell over laughing.

"OH MAN!" he laughed out, rolling on the floor. "SHE SURE KNOWS HOW TO GET YA'!" Posted innocently (Innocent _my ass) _on the board, was a single photograph. It was Soul, clearly asleep with his mouth wide and drool pouring from his mouth onto his pillow in buckets. His hair was all over the place and his shirt was pulled up over his stomach, one hand scratching his stomach. The other hand was wrapped around the neck of his guitar, which he was _cuddling like a teddy bear. _Under the picture was tacked a note, the handwriting neat and so clearly his meister's that Soul considered going and beating her with the whole damn board.

_There is _plenty_ more where this came from. Give me back my book._

_- M_

He knew exactly what book she was talking about. Her large, hardcover edition, "Master Edition Collection of Shakespeare: All of His Works," and let me tell you, the thing was a _behemoth_. Soul had hidden it after a particularly nasty Maka-Chop and Maka had been cross with him the entire week that followed. But he had never expected this kind of retribution. In fact, he didn't know Maka had even taken a picture like this.

That worried him. That worried him _shitless._

The fact that his meister would be this devious made his metaphorical hackles stand on end. With a snarl, he turned on his heel and stalked away from the board, everyone jumping out of the enraged Demon Scythe's way.

"Aren't you going to take that picture down?"Black Star said while he wiped away any leftover tears of mirth, catching up with Soul easily.

"That would be like admitting defeat," he snarled. "Oh no, I'm going to cover that photo." Everyone in the hall shuddered at his evil smirk. "I am going to _cover _that photo."

The next day, Maka walked to the board to see if the picture was still there and was met with Soul's comeback statement. A small picture of her, young at the age of 6, running down the hall of her old house with a large smile on her face being chased by her papa who wore an exasperated expression. The younger her was running around in a tank top and, this is where shit got weird, _pumpkin panties._ Maka's face lit up like fireworks as she heard the people around her laugh. There was a note under the picture and Maka snarled at the messy handwriting.

_Two can play at this game Maka. You're on._

_- S_

People would later claim to be there when Maka's face went from embarrassed to evil, her mouth twisting up in an evil smile that haunted many people in their nightmares that night. She cracked her knuckles and turned towards the corner at the end of the hall, sensing her partner's soul wavelength as easily as her own.

"YOU WANT A WAR SOUL EATER EVANS?" Maka yelled, using his surname just to piss him off (it totally worked). "WELL YOU GOT ONE! HAVE FUN WATCHING YOUR BACK FOR THE NEXT FEW WEEKS, BECAUSE I AM GONNA MAKE YOUR LIFE A LIVING HELL!" She turned on her heel, ripping down both photos and notes from the board, singing quietly "All my life I've been good, but now, ooh~ I'm thinking what the hell?"

Soul smirked and leaned against the wall, tapping Maka's large book against the palm of his large, rough hand. "Not if I make your life one first."

**-0-**

**MAKA: 1**

**SOUL: 1**

**-0-**

The next week was among the most famous in Shibusen's history. The weapon and meister pair flung practical jokes at each other, never breaking, never ceasing. The two lived together, so it had become a school wide event to watch for them in the morning and see what had happened off school grounds.

The first morning, Maka came to school with her wet hair hanging down her back, what looked like flour in her ashy blonde locks and covering the front of her shirt. Soul looked fine, but he refused to open his mouth for anything. It was only when Maka tickled him mercilessly that it was revealed that his teeth were tinted green. Later that week, Soul opened his locker and was buried in an avalanche of dirty laundry (courtesy of the boy's locker room). Maka giggled evilly as she stood at her own locker, but opened it to find that all of her books had been replaced with teddy bears and pictures of Ox littering the door.

"Oh that's just wrong!" Maka hissed, slamming her locker closed. Soul smirked, pulling a jock strap off his arm.

"You want to talk about wrong? I'm pretty sure that was Black Star's." Both teens stood chest to chest snarling at each other. "You wanna stop before you get hurt little girl?" Soul growled, looking down at Maka (she cursed his recent growth spurt that had added nearly a foot to his height).

"Oh I think it's _you _who wants to stop. You grew up in the lap of luxury; I grew up in Death City, with _Black Star_. I think I have a bit more experience with puling pranks than you."

"Oh, you would be surprised what rich kids do when their bored." Both teens turned on their heels and stomped off. Maka stopped halfway and turned an ear to the end of the hall, smirking evilly. A scream came from the other hall a few seconds later and Maka turned the corner to see her partner hanging from the ceiling from his foot.

"You were saying?" she asked, batting her eyelashes innocently. She reached into the closet and pulled out a sign and bullhorn. "COME AND GET SOME LADIES! DEATH SCYTHE SOUL EATER EVANS RIGHT HERE!" Soul stopped cussing and shot Maka a horrified look, shaking at the sound of hundreds of heels running down the hall.

"MAKA! MAKA THAT ISN'T FUNNY!" A mob of girls rounded the corner and he screamed. Maka propped up the sign, advertising that she was selling time with the terrified Death Scythe for five dollars. The girls flew past her, leaving the meister with windblown hair and enough money to buy a partner's screams were drowned out by the happy cries of at least two hundred fangirls and Maka smirked as she tucked the money into her backpack.

"Any particular reason why you let the dogs loose on your partner?" Maka turned and smiled at the confused Shinigami.

"Oh hi Kidd! Yeah, it's just a little practical joke," she said, smiling warmly.

"I GOT HIS SHIRT!" one girl yelled and was promptly tackled by the other girls. Kidd looked back at Maka with horror shining in his amber eyes.

"Yeah, just a joke," he said warily, shying away from the smiling girl. The swarm of girls moved on, revealing Soul on the floor, missing most of his clothes and covered head to toe in lipstick marks. His right eye twitched violently as Kidd helped him up.

"I… cannot believe you!" he yelled. Maka simply smiled, batting her eyelashes at her irate partner. He growled at her and with a final glare, headed towards his bike wearing only his boxers. Laughing evilly, Maka walked over to the mission board where a scoreboard resided ever since the prank war had started a week ago. She uncapped the marker and made a tally on her side. The green-eyed meister took a step back and surveyed the board with a nod of her head. With that, she turned down the hall, savoring her small victory the entire walk home.

**-0-**

**MAKA: 23**

**SOUL: 19**

**-0-**

Soul stood with his back to one of Shinigami's masks (AN- you know, the ones that make up the school) the next morning, glaring heatedly at every girl that passed. The rest of his friends stood with him, watching him warily.

"So, what's your comeback move?" Black Star said, bouncing up and down excitedly. For once, Black Star didn't care that he wasn't the star, it was just too damn interesting.

"Stole all of her clothes and replaced them with Blair's crap," the Death Scythe said with a large smirk. All of his friend's but Black Star stared at him, their jaws on the floor.

"I-I don't know how to deal with this!" Chrona wailed, clutching his head. Tsubaki had her hands over her mouth, gasping in shock. Black Star and Patti were rolling on the floor laughing, and both Kidd and Liz stared incredulously at the albino teen.

"You are out of your mind, you know that right?" Kidd said, his voice remaining calm and monotonous even though he was panicking on the inside.

"Not to mention sadistic," Liz added, shaking her head. Soul just smiled, but his smile faltered when he heard a collective gasp from the stairs. He turned his head, prepared to laugh at his meister, but the laughter died in his throat as she appeared, pissed as all hell. As she stomped past the other students, she could feel their eyes on her and her face went red. She had waken up to find only a pair of leather pants, leather jacket, and a bikini top made out of some weird purple material, and needless to say, she had gone ballistic. But Maka had a perfect attendance record to uphold, and so with all of her blood rushing to her face, she threw on the skimpy (and unbelievably tight) outfit and walked to school.

Soul felt the blood begin to trickle from his nose, and he quickly threw up his hand to cover his nosebleed. This had been a bad, BAD (GENIUS) idea, and this was only confirmed by the look on Maka's face.

'_Oh wait, that's the point,' _he thought. "Hey Maka, love the new look!" he called out, wiping his nose quickly.

"You cocky son of a-" Soul flew back at least ten feet when Maka hit him hard in the face, holding a roll of dimes in place of her brass knuckles (Blair took them away after she had used them on Spirit) and punching him as hard as she possibly could. As she lunged forward to take another swing at her now bleeding partner, the other girls in the group grabbed her arms, holding the enraged girl back. "THERE WAS A LINE SOUL! AND YOU JUST CROSSED IT!" she shrieked, her face red. Soul stood slowly, holding his swollen cheek but still smirking widely.

"You think that was crossing the line? Try throwing your PARTNER to the god damn DOGS," he growled out. With a snarl, Maka broke out of the female weapons' grip, ignoring the girls' protests. She stalked forward and when she was a foot away from the taller boy, she held out her hand expectantly. Soul looked down at her palm and quirked a silvery eyebrow. "You want a high five or something-"

"I want my clothes back," she growled out, emerald fire burning in her eyes. Soul's smirk only grew as he reached forward and patted his irate meister on the head.

"Well you'll have to wait until school's out babe," he said condescendingly, a wide, shit-eating smirk on his face.

Of course Maka wiped that grin off his face pretty quickly when she reached behind him and yanked mercilessly on his boxers, giving the Death Scythe a wedgie that rivaled those that BlackStar so often handed out.

"Isn't that against the rules or something?" Liz said quietly. Both Maka and Soul snapped their heads around to look at the demon pistol.

"Yes, harming the opponent results in a loss of five points," Kid said in a very business-like tone. The color quickly drained from Maka's face and Soul punched the air victoriously.

"YES!" he yelled happily, smiling widely. "PUT THAT IN YOUR JUICE BOX AND SUCK IT!" Maka glared heavily at him and considered hitting him again, but losing 10 points in one day would put her too far behind, so instead she walked away calmly, heading towards the locker rooms where she could grab her gym shirt to change into.

Her revenge on Soul would have to wait for another day.

**-0-**

**MAKA: 18**

**SOUL: 20**

**-0-**

**This was totally necessary.**

_**TOTALLY.**_

_**NECESSARY.**_

**HAPPY APRIL FOOLS GUYS! Don't get pranked too hard!**

**Next chapter will be up sometime next week, but DTMOB update comes first. Then I'm going to be focusing on AG for a while.**

**Believe it or not, I do not own Soul Eater. Shocker, I know.**


	2. Chapter 2

Maka sighed as she slowly woke up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. '_That stupid prank war is still going on I guess,' _she though dryly, staring at the plastic spider on her nose in distaste. If this was the best Soul could come up with, then she would win no doubt. Flicking the spider off her face, she stretched with a loud yawn, rolling out the kinks in her neck. Maka grabbed a change of clothes and headed for the shower, checking the door before opening it fully.

It had now been nearly three weeks since this whole "war" had started, and Maka was sick of it. Today should have been like any other Saturday, the whole day spent kicking Soul's ass at video games and trying for the millionth time to make cookies that didn't resemble rocks. But instead she's avoiding her hair dryer, checking every door she walks through, and all the while trying to best Soul's attempts. Don't get her wrong, it was fun…

For the first week.

Now she just wanted to get back into the comfortable groove she and her partner had developed over the years.

'_Maybe I should just let him win,' _Maka thought as she closed the bathroom door behind her, shedding her clothes quickly and stepping into the shower. As she spurted her favorite coconut-scented shampoo into her hand, Maka tried to think of all the different ways that she could let Soul win without it _looking_ like she let him win. She was willing to put aside her pride to end this, all in the name of Saturday Rock Cookies.

That is, until she noticed the goop in her hands didn't smell of coconuts.

'_He wouldn't!' _Maka thought with a hiss, pulling her hands away from her hair, eyes widening when she noticed that her hands were _blue._

"_SOUL EATER EVANS!"_

Soul smirked from his room, Maka's shrieks of rage echoing through the whole apartment. His plan had worked flawlessly, and he was glad for the victory. '_Hopefully it'll be over soon,' _he admitted. He was as sick of this game as Maka was, and he knew that one of them had to win in order to fix this mess. Of course, the idea of letting Maka win hadn't even crossed his mind (he is a man after all, they tend to not take losses well).

He strode from his room, his steps having a new swagger as he went to the kitchen. He had just opened the refrigerator to grab himself some orange juice when he heard his partner _plop, plop, plopping_ down the hall.

Maka emerged in the doorway in all of her furious glory. She looked like she could kill kittens with her bare hands at the moment, and Soul briefly thought that no girl should be able to look so threatening in a fluffy blue bath towel.

Or with bright blue locks of hair that conveniently matched her towel.

"What is _this_!" his meister hissed, shoving the bottle of what had once been shampoo in her partner's face. Soul leaned back a bit and pushed the bottle away from his head, an evil smirk never leaving his face.

"Why, I believe that is shampoo," Soul said innocently, his tone not fooling Maka for a second. She stepped closer to him, suddenly much too close. It didn't matter that her hair was currently a shade that rivaled BlackStar's, she was still Maka, and Soul was still a teenage boy with horrible, _horrible, _hormones. So naturally, his entire body seemed to catch on fire from the heat his still wet meister was generating like a furnace.

"No," Maka hissed, unaware of her weapon's sudden urge to rip the towel off her body, "What is it that you _put _in my shampoo bottle?"

"Oh," he said, looking off to the side smugly. "Just some of BlackStar's hair dye. Though I must say, it held better than it does on him." He watched in silent amusement (and agony) as Maka shrieked wordlessly, pulling on blue locks of hair and letting her towel slip a bit.

" I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU DYED MY HAIR BLUE!" the once blonde meister screamed, stomping around the kitchen.

"Oh calm down," Soul said with a roll of his eyes, leaning back against the counter and taking a sip of orange juice straight from the carton. His eyes never left the long legs emerging from the blue towel as he said "It'll wash out in a few day."

Maka came to a complete halt. "_A FEW DAYS!_" she shrieked, her voice climbing to an octave that would have made Mariah Carey jealous. "IT'S SATURDAY SOUL! WE HAVE SCHOOL IN _ONE DAY_! I AM _NOT_ GOING TO SCHOOL LIKE-LIKE- LIKE _THIS_!"

"Then don't go to school," Soul said with a shrug, enjoying the look of pure shock that crossed his meister's face. Maka's mouth opened and closed, the teenage girl seemingly at a loss for words. With a withering glare, Maka hitched up her towel and stormed back into the bathroom, determined to wash the horrible color from her hair in one day. Soul watched with blood red eyes as she left, and only when he heard the lock to the bathroom slide closed did he let loose a round of deep, guttural laughter.

"OH SHUT UP!" Maka's voice screamed from the bathroom, only making her weapon laugh harder.

Well, until the toaster caught on fire.

"WHAT THE FU-" Maka smiled evilly as a small explosion rocked the tiny apartment. She stepped out of the bathroom once again and laughed at the sight of her weapon covered in toast guts.

"Payback mother fucker," she said with a smirk, grabbing a phone on her way back to the bathroom. '_Tsubaki should know how to get this out of my hair,' _she thought as she plopped herself back in the tub, throwing the bottle of what had once been shampoo out the tiny window.

**-0-**

**MAKA: 42**

**SOUL: 39**

**-0-**

Soul wandered the halls of Shibusen like a cat on the prowl, eyes darting every which way to look out for any of Maka's minions. During the second week of the prank war, Maka had ('_Very smartly_,' Soul admitted) recruited about fifteen lower classmen, mainly boys Soul had noticed with a growl, that she had set up all over the school. They set up booby traps, threw water balloons at him, one had even gone so far as to key his bike.

Soul had promptly shoved the kid down the stairs in front of the school.

Now as he walked down the halls, every one of his senses was on high alert. He was so close to the end mark of 50, so, SO, close, but Maka was closer. He needed a prank that would break the blonde meister, thus granting him an easy victory. It was simple strategy, and strategy had always been Soul's strong point.

So why was he currently making a deadline for Chrona's locker?

"Yo, Chrona," Soul said calmly, striding up to the pink haired male. Chrona stiffened immediately, but relaxed when he realized that it was just Soul.

"O-oh, h-hi Soul," he said shakily, smiling slightly. "H-how are you?"

"I've been better," Soul admitted with a grunt. "Listen, I need to talk to Ragnarok."

"W-why?"

"Yeah!" Soul watched with a blank expression as Ragnarok suddenly appeared, shooting violently out of poor Chrona's back. "Why would I want to talk to an idiot like you?"

"I need a prank that will guarantee my victory," Soul deadpanned, ignoring the Black Blood's childish insults.

"Run out of ideas?" Ragnarok sneered. Soul simply rolled his eyes and crossed his arms.

"Look, I can do this without you," Soul turned and began to walk away. Ragnarok couldn't see the devilish smirk on his face, and soul quietly counted down from five. '_Five, four, three, two, o-'_

"Wait!" Soul stopped, turning his head slightly.

"Hm?" he asked, looking bored.

"I have an idea, but I'll only work with you if you give me a six-pack of Red Bulls." Soul turned all the way around, smirking dangerously. He stuck his hand out and Ragnarok took it easily, ignoring Chrona's sputtered protests.

"Deal."

"W-wait Soul! Y-you don't k-know how he g-gets after drinking R-Red Bulls!"

A few hours later, both boys hid behind the corner as Maka opened her locker carefully. Her hair had almost gone back to its original color, but it was still lightly tinted blue. She took a few wide steps back as her locker door swung open, but after a moment, the meister deemed it safe and reached in to collect her books.

Maka nearly jumped through the roof when something slipped out of her locker and landed with a soft _tap _on the tiled floor. It was a simple white envelope, but it seemed to scream "DANGER! ABORT ABORT ABORT!"

"What's that?"

"AIEEEEE!" This time Maka _did_ jump, turning quickly with fists held up prepared. Liz stood there, hands on her hips as she quirked a well-groomed eyebrow. "Oh, sorry Liz," Maka said, clutching the fabric above her heart. "I'm just a bit on edge."

"I couldn't tell," Liz said sarcastically. "So, what's that?"

"Dunno," Maka said, picking up the envelope gingerly. "It just fell out of my locker."

"You're gonna open it, right?" The taller weapon said, walking up behind Maka and looking over her shoulder.

"I don't know," Maka said, quirking her head to the side. "It might be another prank from Soul." Liz reached over and plucked the envelope from Maka's small hand. The meister protested, but Liz just pushed her back and opened the envelope with one hand.

"Dear Maka," she began, eyes half-lidded. "Oh they made the 'M' look like a little heart, how quaint. Any whom, 'Dear Maka, I am afraid I can no longer deny my growing affection towards you-' Oh my god." Liz's eyes widened. "This is a _love letter- _Maka you sly dog! Why did you not tell me about this?"

"Because I didn't know about it!" Maka said with a growl, reaching for the letter again. But Liz just pushed her back, dodging the meister's attacks.

" 'Your green eyes are like shimmering emeralds in the starlight,' " Liz continued, her thin lips pulled up in a coy smile. " 'And your hair is like spun gold. The way you move during battle is like watching a beautiful angel of death-' Oooh, the Angel of Death, I like that! Do you like that nickname Maka?"

"GIVE IT BACK!" Maka screeched, jumping on Liz's back and reaching over the demon pistol's shoulder.

"Patti, catch!" Liz shouted, throwing the love letter at her sister who was walking towards them with Tsubaki.

"Wha-"

"Patti!" Maka yelled, still on Liz's back. "Give me back that letter!"

"Keep reading from 'Angel of Death!' " Liz said with a laugh. Patti gave a quick "Hai!" and scanned the first portion of the letter quickly, picking up where her sister left off.

" '–A beautiful angel of death flying across the bright night sky. I wish I could only tell you how much I admire your resolve and courage, but a mere letter would do these feelings no justice,' " Patti read, blue eyes shining. Tsubaki quickly snatched the letter out of the demon pistol's hands and continued to read, her voice filled with happiness.

" 'So in order to fully explain my growing feelings, I would like to meet you in front of the Italian café on Level 5!' " Tsubaki squealed happily, the three other girls crowding around her to read over her shoulder.

" 'I will wait for you at five o'clock after school, where we will finally meet face to face,' " Liz read, wonder in her voice.

" 'Until we meet for the first time, Parker Walden.' " Maka said finally, her curiosity overcoming her suspicion. The other three girls gasped, staring at Maka with wide eyes.

"Parker Walden?" Liz said, her jaw nearly hitting the ground. "_The _Parker Walden!"

"Who's that?" the blonde meister said, quirking her head to the side. The three weapons once again gasped, their jaws unhinging and hitting the floor.

"WHO'S PARKER WALDEN!" the three screeched, their eyes wide.

"That's like asking a cartoonist who Chuck Jones is!" Patti shrieked, the other two weapons faltering at the weird comparison.

"Parker Walden," Tsubaki said, staring at the youngest weapon with a tilted head, "Is only the single hottest guy in all of Shibusen!" Liz grabbed Maka by the shoulders, twisting the shorter girl around and pointing at a boy standing at the end of the hall. Maka felt her jaw drop at the sight of the boy, and the three older girls smiled smugly.

Parker Walden was tall, with lightly tanned skin. He had short black hair curling around his temple and shining green eyes rivaling Maka's own. Maka stared at him for a few more seconds before turning away with a slight blush.

"P-please, he's not that hot. Besides, I don't like guys with dark hair," she said, her arms crossed over her chest.

"Oh, we know," Liz said with a smug smile. "You much prefer boys with white hair." Maka's face lit up like the fourth of July and Soul perked up slightly, leaning closer in to hear better.

"_You don't think she means_ you, _do you?_" Ragnarok whispered loudly, but he was interrupted from teasing the Death Scythe further when the albino boy threw his hand over the Demon Sword's mouth (or, the place where his mouth should be).

"T-that is not true!" Maka sputtered indigently, reclaiming Soul's attention. "You know what, fine! I will go and meet this Parker guy-"

"Parker _Walden_," Tsubaki quickly amended.

"You can't just say Parker, it's like an insult to hot guys everywhere," Liz said with a roll of her eyes.

"Okay, okay, I'll go meet Parker _Walden, _and I'll tell him I'm not interested," Maka finished with a nod, closing her locker gingerly. Her hand rested on her locker a moment longer before she sighed. "I'm waiting for someone else."

The four girls walked away, leaving the two boys hiding behind the corner.

"Good job with the letter Chrona," Ragnarok said with a sneer in his voice. "I guess all of that dumb poetry was good for something in the end." Chrona nodded shyly, a faint blush dusting his pale cheeks. Soul noticed this with a low growl, deciding that after this whole prank war business was over with, he would have a little "chat" with the pink haired boy about staying away from his meister (Shinigami knows he's beat enough boys off of Maka already).

"So what now Ragnarok?" Soul asked, pushing away his annoyance at the pink haired meister.

"We wait until she goes and meets this Parker-"

"Parker _Walden_," Chrona corrected meekly.

"-Guy, and then we launch our attack!" the Demon Sword finished proudly. "It'll be the ultimate prank!"

"Wait, w-what attack!" Chrona asked, clutching the black fabric above his heart.

"We gather up a few guys from around school to help us pelt Maka with water balloons filled with mayonnaise," Ragnarok said with a shrug. Both Soul and Chrona let their jaws hit the floor.

"T-that's… T-that's… T-that's-"

"BRILLIENT!" Soul cheered, crimson eyes lighting up. "This will definitely guarantee my victory!" he said, scratching his chin thoughtfully as he paced back and forth. "Now who are we gonna ask to help out?"

"Half the school is on your side dude. It's just a matter of gathering them up."

**-0-**

**MAKA: 42**

**SOUL: 39.5**

**-0-**

**Oh wow, this didn't take forever to get out. I'M SO SORRY GUYS! All of my other stories took over my brain! Even now, I have three other stories to work on (DTMOB, AG, and a new story that will be coming out this summer). Thankfully, I only have seven days left of school!**

**Now I know I said this was going to be a two-shot, but I think having three parts will work better. Also, these are fairly short chapters compared to my other stories, so this should be done pretty soon. **

**Next chapter of AG is going to be up two Friday's from now, so the final chapter of All's Fair should be up on… the 16****th**** of June? (Which, btw, is FreyaLin's birthday, so everyone tell her happy birfday when the next chapter goes up). **

**See ya'll next time!**

**I do not own Soul Eater, though I do own a very awesome shirt of my own design! (I made it for a club at school, and of course they waited 'till the last two weeks to get them in.)**

**Reviews keep Parker, Parker **_**Walden.**_

**V**

**V**

**V **


	3. Chapter 3

It doesn't occur to him that this might not be the greatest plan until he's crouching next to Chrona in the bushes, watching his meister take a seat in front of the Italian cafe ten minutes before five.

"Wow," Ragnarok said dryly, head propped up on his fist and his elbow digging into his miester's head. "If that's what she looks like before a date with the hottest guy in school, then it doesn't surprise me that she doesn't get out much." Soul couldn't help but agree. Maka was all business, sitting on the bench with her hands folded in her lap. The only indication that this wasn't a business meeting was the slight hint of makeup that she wore. Soul had watched as Liz and Tsubaki had all but kidnapped her after the final class, dragging her to the bathroom to get ready for her date.

"W-well I think she l-looks nice," Chrona said quietly, fidgeting slightly was a light blush on his face. Soul turned and glared at the pinkette, quirking his eyebrow.

"What did we talk about earlier Chrona?"

"O-off l-limits, I know," he mumbled. "But n-no one else was g-gonna say it."

"Well of course not! We're here to prank her, not take her out to dinner!" Ragnarok jeered. "It doesn't matter how pretty she is, she's not gonna be too pretty covered in condiments." The black blood creature cackled loudly, and Soul and Chrona immediately tried to quiet him.

"Idiot!" Soul hissed. "She'll hear you!"

"Sorry."

"So, that's the target I assume?" The albino Death Scythe looked up at the newest member of their little group, none other than the one and only Parker.

Parker Walden, sorry.

Soul sort of got why all the girls fawned after him, but he had been hanging out with him for the past day while planning out this last prank, and can he just say that he does not get the appeal. Parker Walden was an ass. It had taken them ten minutes longer than usual to get to the stupid meeting place because he was too busy checking himself out in every reflective surface he passed. "Wow, not bad," the black haired boy said with a faint smirk. "Not much in the chest department, but she's got some killer legs."

"Okay," Soul growled, pinching the bridge of his nose. "You're new, so I'm gonna make this quick. Maka is my meister. MINE. So no touching, no flirting, and no sweeping her off her feet. I've seen what you do to girls and I'm not gonna let you do that to my meister." Parker Walden held up his hands in defeat, his smirk growing.

"Hey man, chill out. I'm not going to touch your girlfriend. She's not my type."

Soul had long ago given up on correcting people when they called Maka his girlfriend, so he just sighed and made a mental note to introduce the boy next to him to his cat. He had a feeling that Blair would be able to whip him into shape. "Alright, enough joking around," he said, rising up slightly and heading back towards the rest of his group. "Let's do this."

Soul couldn't help but feel proud as he surveyed the large group of teens that were milling around the clearing. In one day, he and Ragnorok had been able to gather up a group of sixty kids to help them out, gotten them organized, and assembled them here to pull off the greatest prank yet. They had built an army in a day, and he wondered if Maka would have been proud of his leadership skills.

"Soul!" A busty girl ran up to him, smiling widely. Soul recognized her as one of his fangirls and groaned internally. "All the balloons are filled up and ready to go sir!" It scared him a bit how eager she was to pelt his meister with mayonnaise, but brushed the feeling aside. He had come this far...

"Good job," he said with a grin and a nod, rolling his eyes when she swooned. He turned back to the group of chatting teens and clapped his hands together once. "Hey! Can I get everyone's attention? Guys!" The group turned to him and a hush fell over the crowd. Soul felt Chrona on his left and Parker Walden on his right, and smiled.

He loved it when a plan came together.

"Alright, I'd like to thank everyone for helping us out today!" he started, projecting his voice so that even the people in the back could hear him loud and clear. "Now I'm sure you all know about the prank war going on between myself and a Miss Maka Albarn. Well, as of today, that war is over. This is the final attack! The one that will bring us victory!" There was a loud cheer, both Ragnorok and Parker Walden pumping their fists into the air. "Now, is anyone still a bit unclear about the plan?" Soul asked the crowd, not expecting anyone to step forward. Half of the group had been briefed about the plan at lunch and then given instructions to relay the plan to the rest of the group. A sure silence followed his question, and the Death Scythe grinned. "Perfect. Now let's go!"

There was a loud cheer as the group went into action. Some of the teens were passing out the goop-filled balloons to the others, each teen getting two. Soon they had all disappeared from the clearing, getting into position and leaving only Soul, Chrona, and Parker Walden.

"Well boys, I guess that would be my cue to leave," the raven haired boy said with a confident grin. "I'll meet you slowpokes there." Soul rolled his eyes and turned to go after him, but was stopped by a hand on his arm.

"S-soul, please s-stop this now," Chrona whispered to him, glad Ragnarok had disappeared into his back during the speech and had yet to resurface. "You c-could really h-hurt M-maka!"

"Maka's a tough girl Chrona, I doubt this is going to phase her," Soul said reassuringly, though he was having his doubts. "Look, once this is over, the prank war will be as good as over and everything could go back to normal."

"Could it?"

Soul's smile dropped as Chrona's words sunk in. "S-she trusts you S-soul, and let's f-face it, y-you're playing w-with her f-feeling to win a s-stupid war," Chrona said softly. "J-jerk or not, M-maka still thinks P-parker Walden called her h-here to confess his l-l-love. S-she's going to be h-hurt by this, I just k-know it." He took a deep breath and looked a Soul with hard pale eyes. "Stop this before you ruin your partnership forever."

When Chrona managed to talk without his stutter, you knew he meant business. Soul sighed quietly, running the fingers of his free hand through his shock-white hair nervously.

"I…" he trailed off, biting the inside of his cheek. "I'm sure it'll be fine. Maka's the toughest person I know, she'll be fine." He gave Chrona a reassuring smile and tugged his arm gently from his grasp. Turning on his heel, his smile dropped as he walked towards his meister. "We'll be fine," he said under his breath, closing his eyes and steeling his nerves.

Chrona watched him leave sadly, shaking slightly as he turned and walked in the other direction. "Hey dumbskull!" Ragnarok yelled, shooting out of Chrona's back and pulling roughly on his meister's hair. "You're going the wrong way!"

"N-no I'm n-not," the thin boy said, picking up speed. "I g-gotta go tell t-the girls."

"**TELL THE WHO!**"

"T-tell the girls," he said again, this time with more conviction. "I h-have to warn them s-so they can p-protect Maka!" And with that, Chrona sped towards the basketball courts, ignoring the shrieking, writhing blob of Black Blood on his back as he ran.

**-0-**

**MAKA: 42**

**SOUL: 39.75**

**-0-**

"Maka?"

Soul watched as his meister turned around, smiling a bit. "Hi," she said calmly, standing up.

"You look beautiful," Parker Walden said, smiling softly at the blonde meister, and Soul cringed when she blushed, Chrona's words echoing in his skull. No, she'd be fine. This was all for the best. Just one little prank and he'll have his meister back.

Right?

"Um, thank you," she said shyly.

"I've been looking forward to this moment," Parker Walden said, stepping closer and taking both of her hands in his.

"Look, I really appreciate the letter but-"

Parker Walden's smile turned into a smirk and Soul took a deep breath. It was now or never. He shoved his conscious back violently and stood, plastering a smirk on his face as he walked into the street. Maka turned and looked at Soul, eyes wide with shock.

"Soul?" Maka asked, confusion written all over her features. Soul could feel all the other teens join him, forming a circle around an alarmed-looking Maka. "What's going on?"

"All's fair in love and war," Soul said with a grin.

And the balloons flew.

Some of the group cheered, some screamed battle cries, some laughed. But Soul just watched in absolute silence as his meister was pelted with the water balloons, the projectiles seeming to knock her around more than they should have. He winced when one balloon hit her in the cheek, the white sauce splashing across her face as she cried out in pain. He noticed a bit of blood on her cheek and realized with a start that someone had probably shoved a rock in one of the balloons. That was not cool, he had set rules with everyone! Nothing above the shoulders and nothing but mayonnaise in the balloons. Some fucker had just broken both of those rules.

What felt like hours had in reality only been a few seconds, and soon all the teens were out of ammo. They were all smiling anxiously, waiting for the human hurricane that was Maka Albarn to strike, but nothing happened.

She just stood there, arms held away from her body as mayonnaise dripped off her. Her bangs hung in her face, and Soul felt his heart skid slowly to a stop.

"Maka?" he said, a hint of concern in his voice.

She cringed at the sound of his voice and his heart dropped to his feet. Maka stood there for a few moments longer before she looked up at him. Her eyes were wide and dewy, her bottom lip trembling a bit before she pressed her lips into a thin line.

"Maka?" Soul said again, stepping closer. He felt his stomach tie itself in knots at the heartbreaking expression that twisted her pretty features.

"Come on Albarn," Parker Walden said, his smile turning nervous and weak. "It's just a joke."

Her head whipped around, eyes sparking dangerously as tears began rolling down her cheeks. "Just… a joke?" she said quietly, her voice sounding so weak and frail compared to the cold steel of her eyes. "Let me tell you something, Parker _Walden. _This? Was not a joke." Maka turned around, looking at Soul with such hatred and disgust that he felt dizzy. He'd only ever seen her look at her father like that. "This was not funny," she said softly, as if talking any louder would break her.

Soul took a step closer to her, wincing when she took a step back in return. "Maka, I-"

"**EVERYONE GET OUT OF MY GOD DAMN WAY."**

Soul's head whipped around as Tsubaki shoved her way through the crowd, her normally serene features twisted into a fearsome scowl. Liz and Patti trailed after her, followed by a very beat up looking Chrona. The four teens all rushed towards Maka, Patti wrapping the towel she brought around the shorter girl's shoulders. "We got ya," the blonde said reassuringly, wrapping her arm tight around her shoulders.

"**You should all feel ashamed," **Tsubaki hissed, eyes sparking with a rage that rivaled her meister's. "Playing with a girl's feeling like that, and for a joke!" She spun around, accusing every teen in the crowd with only her eyes. Soul could practically feel everyone shrink under the Dark Arm's glare. He stiffened when she jerked her head towards him, looking at him with a look that rivaled Maka's. "And you!" she screamed, storming up to him and gabbing her finger in his chest. "How **DARE **you! She is your **meister. **Prank war or not, your duty is to protect her!" Tsubaki grabbed his face and forced him to look at the crying Maka, who was being shielded from view by the Thompsons. "Does she look protected to you?" she hissed in his ear.

Soul jerked himself free, and Tsubaki watched as his face contorted in worry and remorse. "But I-"

"I do **not **want to hear what you have to say, Soul Eater," Tsubaki growled. "To think, Maka was about to turn down the hottest jackass in school for you." Soul froze, looking up at the Japanese weapon with wide eyes. She turned away with one last disgusted look, facing the rest of the crowd. "Go," she growled, glaring at the crowd.

"But-" one of the teens spoke up, falling immediately silent when there was the loud sound of metal being sharpened and Tsubaki spun on him, part of her ponytail shifted into a chain scythe.

"**GO!" **she screamed, pointing the blade at him. The group scattered, some scrambling over each other to get away from the Dark Arm's anger. Soon, only Soul and the girls were left. Soul took a step back when Tsubaki spun on him, scowling. She opened her mouth to yell at him some more, but a tiny voice stopped her.

"Tsubaki."

Both weapons turned towards Maka in a flash, Tsubaki's expression instantly softening. Maka had stopped crying and most of the mayonnaise on her face had been smeared off with the help of the towel. She was staring at Soul with a blank expression, and his gut fell at the sight. "Don't bother," she said quietly. "He's not worth it."

Soul's heart fell as he watched Maka turn away, flanked by a Thompson on either side and Chrona walking in front of her, begging for forgiveness. Tsubaki turned to rant at him some more, despite Maka's wishes, but had to stop at the heart-breaking expression on his face. She was pissed, but not heartless. With one final glare, she ran off after the four, leading the way to Gallows Mansion and threatening to murder anyone who stared at her best friend for longer than a few seconds.

**-0-**

**MAKA: 42**

**SOUL: 40**

**-0-**

Soul was running out of rocks to throw.

"COME ON MAKA, I SAID I WAS SORRY!" he screamed at the window, throwing another rock with enough force to crack the window this time. After several attempts to get inside, each attempt foiled either by a Thompson or a Tsubaki, Soul had tried to get to his meister through the window. The one time Chrona had come to the door had resulted in a huge fist fight, and the pinkette refused to come near the door now.

"GO AWAY!" Liz screamed, throwing the window open for a moment so she could yell at the Death Scythe. "We don't want you here, fucktard!"

"I just want to apologize!" Soul yelled, his face contorting in pain. "Please! Look, I know what I did was stupid! I was being prideful and jerkish and an asshole! Please, just let me apologize! I don't want to lose my partner over this!"

Liz contemplated this for a moment, before closing the window and turning back towards the room. Soul wanted to kick something, but instead plopped into the grass, holding his head in his hands.

"God, I really fucked up this time," he growled, smacking himself upside the head.

"I'll say."

The demon scythe's head jerked up, watching as Maka leaned against the window sill, green eyes flat. She looked like she had just come out of the shower, and the fluffy white bathrobe she wore was starting to slide off one of her shoulders.

"Maka," Soul breathed, scrambling back onto his feet. "Maka, I'm so sorry," he said sincerely, holding his palms up imploringly. "Please, forgive me."

"You're going to have to do better than that," Maka said. Her tone was cold, but her eyes were what broke him into a thousand pieces. She turned away from the window and Soul almost screamed "Wait!"

Maka stopped, but didn't turn back towards him. Knowing this was the most he was going to get, Soul took a deep breath. "I surrender," he said loudly, sighing quietly in relief when she turned slightly back towards him. "You win. I know it's not much, but it's all I can really offer. I know we never decided on what the prizes would be, so just… I'll do whatever."

The blonde meister turned all the way around, her hands gripping the window sill as she looked down at him. She may have been the one who had bruises all over her body from where a fangirl and thrown a balloon too hard, but she couldn't help but wonder who looked more miserable.

She just stared at him for what seemed to be years, and Soul sighed, his entire body collapsing on itself as he slouched. "Never mind," he said as he turned away. "I'll just leave you alone now-"

"You have to do your own homework for the rest of the school year."

The Death Scythe spun around, watching her with wide eyes as she sat on the sill, her arms crossed over her chest. "I'm not going to do it for you anymore," she said dryly, "you're on your own."

"Agreed," Soul said quickly, turning back towards her.

"And you have to do all the house work for a month, and none of that half-assed bullshit."

"Wouldn't dream of it."

"You have to cook dinner too," Maka said.

"I will try not to burn anything," Soul said earnestly. There was a moment of silence, where Maka just stared at Soul and Soul stared at her.

"This doesn't mean I forgive you," Maka said coolly. "It's going to take a long time for you to gain back my trust Soul." Soul nodded sadly, eyes fixed guilty on his feet.

"Yeah… I know," he said quietly.

"I'm going to stay here for the night," Maka continued, standing and unfolding her arms. "I'll be home tomorrow. Maybe."

"I'll be there," Soul said, watching as she stepped back and closed the windows. He turned and left with his head down, broken and defeated, unaware of the green eyes that watched him leave.

"He s-seemed really s-s-sincere," Chrona offered, holding a raw steak over the black eye Soul had given him.

"Doesn't mean we're not still pissed," Liz growled. Tsubaki placed her hand on the Demon Gun's shoulder, restraining her gently. The good thing about Tsubaki's anger was that it passed quickly, and usually left her calm and ready to listen.

"Maka, what do you think?" Tsubaki asked, the attention of the other four in the room on the blonde.

"He really is sorry," she said quietly. After a moment, she walked over to where Patti was sitting on the bed, plopping down next to her and curling up in her side. "Is it wrong that I don't forgive him yet?" she asked, looking up at her friends with teary eyes. Both Patti and Liz wrapped their arms tight around their friend, whispering encouragements in her ears.

"It's up to you when you want to forgive him," Liz said. "I personally think you make him work for it."

"Yeah yeah!" Patti said happily. "Make the fucker pay!"

Maka smiled weakly at the two. "Thanks guys."

"No prob!" the two sisters said, grinning widely. After that, none of the friends mentioned the awful prank, instead focusing on cheering Maka up. For the most part, it worked, though there were still moments where they would catch the meister looking out the nearest window with sad eyes.

What they didn't know, was that across town, Soul was doing the exact same thing.

**-0-**

**MAKA: Winner**

**SOUL: Pathetic Little Fuc- Loser**

**-0-**

"Aw crap," Soul growled, sticking his bleeding finger in his mouth. "Thas the third thime this week."

For the past month, Soul had been on dinner duty. And though he had gotten significantly better over the month, he still had a tendency to cut himself with the kitchen knife.

"You'd think a scythe would be able to cook without slicing his finger open," Soul grumbled to himself, sticking his nicked finger in the stream of running water from the sink.

"You would, wouldn't you?"

Soul's head jerked around, watching as Maka pulled herself onto the counter. She turned towards him and the Death Scythe felt the air leave him.

She was smiling at him.

After a month, she was _finally _smiling at him again.

The road to forgiveness had been tough for both weapon and meister. Maka had given him the cold shoulder for nearly ten days before finally giving in and speaking to him again. For Soul, the road had been paved with Maka-Chops, slammed doors, and the evil glares that the three female weapons would shoot him. Shinigami had been smart enough to not send the two on any missions during their month of dissonance, and even Spirit had known well enough to leave them alone.

"Want some help?" Maka asked, swinging her legs back and forth as Soul shook the thoughts out of his head. She snorted quietly, amused by his reaction.

"Yeah, that would be great," Soul said, still watching her with a slightly stunned expression. Her smile grew and she hopped off the counter, taking his place in front of the cutting board. Soul watched her work in silence for a few moments before joining her, working over the stove and directing her when she asked what ingredient came next.

He didn't need to ask if he had been forgiven. He could already see it in her smile, and in the way her eyes lit up when she laughed. He smiled warmly at her and she smiled back, their souls synching together easily with an unspoken "I'm sorry".

Together, they had dinner finished in half the time that it would take Soul to do it alone, and they sat down at the table, eagerly digging into their meal. They didn't talk much, only a few random snippets here and there, but the silence was warm and comforting, unlike the tense silences that had followed the mayonnaise incident.

Somewhere between dinner and dishes, it hit Soul like a ton of bricks to the face.

It was there in the way she made his stomach twist itself in knots in the best way possible, in the way his mouth watered at the scent of coconuts ever since she started using a similarly scented shampoo. It was plain to see in their entire partnership, hell, he had the proof slashing across his chest in a pink line of sunken-in flesh.

Soul was in love with her.

It was a natural realization, and Soul let it wash over him in waves. Maka must have sensed something through their bond, because she looked up from the sink.

"Soul?" she asked gently, eyes big and green with curiosity. He let himself drown in the various greens of her eyes before he smirked, throwing a handful of bubbles in her face.

"Gotcha," he said teasingly, his smirk growing when she spluttered and growled.

"Oh it's on," she said, smirking back as she grabbed the spray nozzle from its hook and turning it on him. Even as she drenched him, he just laughed.

Besides, all's fair in love and war.

**-0-**

**MAKA: Winner**

**SOUL: Surrender**

_(the sweetest kind)_

**-0-**


End file.
